Real Relationships

Do you know those couples that have been dating forever? Who are "perfect for each other?" Who never seem to fight and are sure to get married in the future? Then they break up. That just screws with my whole view on relationships. Sometimes I see couples who have been dating for so long and seem like they're just so in love as those people who have "the perfect relationship." Then something happens. They fight in public (gasp!) or even worse, they take a break!!! Then I realize that nobody is perfect and that everyone has some kinks to work out no matter what kind of relationship they have-romantic, or just as friends. Real relationships are hard. You have to be willing to put the other person before you-their wants, needs, and such. It's so easy to just get angry over little things that can cause such problems in a relationship. Instead of talking things over, people just snap at each other and let their anger build until finally it explodes.

In today's world, women are accepted as independent and yet there are still certain standards that the perfect woman is held to. Besides all of the physical stuff, women are expected to be soft-spoken, hard-working, home-makers, loving, kind, forgiving, motherly, complacent, quiet, and obedient to their authorities (husbands, boyfriends, etc). Basically, women are supposed to be superheroes. Even though these characteristics may not be exactly right (or easy to achieve!), they all are good attributes to have. Lately I have been coming back to I Corinthians 13: 4-7 a lot:

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves."

This is such a great passage that reminds us what love truly is. Being in a relationship isn't about getting your way, the physical benefits, or the satisfaction of someone's affection. It's about getting to know someone while getting to know yourself more as well. It's about applying the above verse and all the true aspects of love. James 1:19 says "...Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry..." True, true true. In every part of life, but definitely in relationships. Today we are taught that if the relationship isn't working, get out of it and find someone new who is going to work better for you. In some instances this may be true, but over-all, with an attitude like that, you're never going to find someone who "works for you." Look at the good things in life, don't just focus on what you don't have.